Over the holiday season, it's common
for families to notice their senior loved ones experience more
physical or cognitive struggles than usual, making it difficult for
them to participate in celebrations and traditions. These changes may
signify that it's time for them to make the transition to a senior
living community. While this transition can present wonderful new
opportunities, such as increased social options and greater support
with everyday tasks, preparing for such a move can be overwhelming –
Logistically, downsizing and moving present huge challenges, and even
after all of these details have been worked out, you'll have to
navigate a rough emotional terrain. Your loved one may experience
intense stress, which can manifest into symptoms like sleep
disturbances, anger, depression and disorientation.
Here are a few ways you can help
support and compassionately ease them into a new life phase:
Be empathetic
This transition happens to almost
everyone; it's just part of life. So try to put yourself in their
shoes and understand the complex, intense emotions they're feeling.
Often, they're dealing with a loss of control and independence, fear
of the unknown and change, isolation, and possibly illness or the
loss of a spouse. Imagine how you'd feel if you suddenly couldn't
drive or perhaps even walk, speak, or think with the same ease as you
do now. Recognize these challenges and try to understand if they're
occasionally moody, angry, or withdrawn. Understanding how they cope
with challenges can also help you support them more effectively.
Listen more than talk
Even though it might feel more
comfortable to avoid a difficult conversation and push everything
under the rug, let your loved one express how they feel. Don't
immediately tell them how wonderful the move will be; allow them to
externally process their fear, confusion, distrust, or anger. Simply
allowing them to do so will help them feel validated and respected.
Involve them in the decision making
process
Similarly, involving them in important
decisions about their new life when possible can help them feel
validated and respected as well. While many well-intentioned family
members may take the burden of decision-making upon themselves,
leaving them out of the conversation may make them feel obsolete or
unimportant, thereby intensifying their feelings of loss of control.
Touring a facility or allowing them to meet the people there before
moving may also help them feel like participants in the transition.
Involve friends and family
The need to connect with other people
doesn't go away when you age. It's important for your loved one to
understand that they have a supportive community behind them, even if
it's just a few family members or friends. Make it a habit to check
up on them often or send them videos, emails, cards, or letters. Make
sure they have plenty of opportunities to socialize in their new home
as well, which will minimize their risk of feeling disconnected and
sad.
Being conscious of your senior loved
one's needs over the holidays and beyond will help ensure their life
change is ultimately as enjoyable and stress-free as possible. We
hope these tips will help you through this journey; let us know if
you have any other suggestions on our Facebook
page! We'd love to hear from you.